True Blue Spark (truebluespark) wrote,
True Blue Spark

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[Life] Doing What I Must

(Be warned: this post jumps around from topic to topic. *snicker*)

Okay, so how is it that, in the past two hours, I accomplished more than I did in the entire past two days? Shirts finally hung in the closet. Two big sacks of garbage tossed into the dumpster. And I didn't get the dishes done, but I did at least collect up all the loose ones and put them in the kitchen. I guess it was the fear of having to think, "I had two days off and didn't get anything done," that spurred me into action.

And I checked the mail on the way back from the dumpster. Got my new voter ID card plus a little comic-book-shaped info packet for Dragon*Con! Okay, there is gonna be way too much stuff to do there. There's an anime track, art workshops, costumes, robotics, I ought to check out the Star Trek track for nostalgia's sake, and I have to see Voltaire perform at least once... Of course, that's assuming I can tear myself away from indigoskynet long enough to see any programming. *hee*

Oh, right, back on the mail topic, I also got a phone book, which is nice. There was a big stack of ten of them sitting by the mailboxes. I assume they're for us tenants. *chuckle*

In unrelated news, I want to apologize to everyone at campfuckudie (especially my fellow Furuba players), for not posting since Wizard World, and to eslington, for, uh, not having ever posted to his Eberron RPG. I promise I'll do something for both games tomorrow night after work. And I'll be on AIM/IRC so you can bitch me out until I do. Deal? Deal.

That's one of my biggest problems. It's kinda like procrastination, but kinda different too. If I manage to stay up to date on things, then it's not difficult to keep up, but the moment I slip, that makes it a lot harder for me. The longer I get behind on something, the harder it is for me to bring myself to catch up. I know it's foolish, but I still haven't shaken the habit.

It's how I screwed up my last college semester so badly. I missed one assignment. So I thought, "Okay, I'll get that done soon." But before I did, it became two assignments, and then three, and more, and the more it piled up, the less enthusiasm I was able to gather up. And soon it was the end of the semester, and I'd never made a motion toward catching up. This is why I'm so nervous about going back to classes. Indigo suggested a while back that I was afraid of success; I don't think that's it. I'm afraid of failure. I'm terrified that I'll fall back into the same habits, that I'll waste the last chance I have to salvage my education.

Okay, I know that's a pessimistic place to leave off, and I'm really feeling more optimistic than that indicates, but I have work tomorrow, so I really should cut this post short and turn in. See you tomorrow, intarweb.
Tags: [life], life: cleaning, life: msu, rp: cfud, rp: eberron, times: dragon*con, topics: catch-up, topics: roleplaying
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