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Life was Bad - Inventor's Log
The Life, Times, Thoughts, and Works of a Creative Young Man
truebluespark
truebluespark
Life was Bad

Okay, folks! I'm going to cover this entire summer in two posts, finally get caught up, and then from now on I'll be able to just post day-to-day updates rather than huge things. Let's begin with part one...

It all started in the spring semester of 2004. (Actually it started a bit earlier than that, but this is where the result showed.) I really can't put into words why I did what I did, but what I did was get overwhelmed. I almost completely stopped going to classes. I just couldn't force myself out of bed in the mornings. My projects went unfinished, tests untaken, but up to the end I kept thinking, "I can pull myself out of this. I'll start tomorrow." Yeah. Not happening. So the grades came. Zeroes where there should, had I been in full possession of my faculties, have been threes or fours. I panicked, of course. But I told myself, "Okay, self, this isn't that bad. I've got an extra semester covered by my scholarship. I'll just use that for the summer and retake all the classes I screwed up." So I sauntered happily off to ACen '04, and when I got back, I found I'd been temporarily suspended from MSU.

Now, this could have been a hell of a lot worse for me than it ended up being. What the deal is is that I'm recessed (I think that's the word they used) for the next year. Once the fall of 2005 rolls around, they'll let me come back, and if I can bring my GPA back above a 3.0 by the end of the year, I'll be able to retain my scholarship. So that's what I'm gonna do. I still have all my books from the classes in question, and over the year I'm going to teach myself what I should have learned already.

What I'm most ashamed of in this whole scenario is that I kept my parents in the dark the whole time. If I'd just talked to them when I started having problems, the whole thing could have been minimized. As it was, though, they only found out when I got recessed. I screwed that up severely. Believe me, that's a lesson I won't soon forget.

OK, that's the first half. I was gonna finish it tonight, but I'm really tired right now and I wanna get to bed at a fairly decent hour. I promise tomorrow I will post regarding the topics "What I did for my summer vacation" and "Gainful employment and its effects on self-hatred".

Just a while ago, I did something I've been meaning to do for some time: I left a prank message on maychan's cell phone voice mail. Just strung together a few sound files of GIR from Invader Zim: "Yeehoo! Hi there! / I'm baking the cake! / Cows are my friends. / Eeeeheeheeheeheeheehee!! / I gotta go, Pig. I'll see ya later!" And hung up. Bwahahaha. Nat's voice mail: PWNED.

Amusing spam titles for the last couple of weeks: "celebrate Boyce's birthday tomorrow". Just because of the name. "Boyce". *snicker* And also "rattlesnake toothpicks inside 5392". WTF is a rattlesnake toothpick? And just now I got one entitled "Urgent Matter for Corinne Dejesus ONLY". So naturally I deleted it. They don't want me reading Corinne's mail, after all!

Tasks Completed will return tomorrow, with any luck. And I'm hoping to have some time tomorrow to do some drawing and finish up Forrester Labs' page design. We'll see. ^_^

Feeling: content content

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Comments
vensre From: vensre Date: September 12th, 2004 10:30 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, Shay. Dude, that's. That's pretty much exactly what I did last fall. I managed a medical withdrawl, because I started having panic attacks and stuff in class, but... a year was wasted for me. Let's hope next year is easier on both of us.

It doesn't necessarily help to tell your parents, though. Or it didn't for me. Because I was calm about it, you know? Like I'd tell my mom, oh yeah, I couldn't leave my room today. And then I'd laugh a little, because you have to laugh when it's that bad. So they didn't realise until I started trying to get my withdrawl going. Maybe a drama class would be a good idea. ^__^'
cynthiaahookway From: cynthiaahookway Date: September 12th, 2004 11:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
omg...did you really say PWNED?!
cynthiaahookway From: cynthiaahookway Date: September 12th, 2004 11:51 pm (UTC) (Link)

Also

Shay, you weren't doing anything wrong by not telling your parents. You are independent and wanted to be able to handle things on your own. That is totally understandable. I went through the same thing where I left KCC for 2 years. Although the expectations are different at a university, you should have no trouble getting back on track. You have always been incredibly smart and well rounded.
luminousmarble From: luminousmarble Date: September 13th, 2004 10:07 am (UTC) (Link)
Ouch. Glad to hear you're on the rebound.
waffledog From: waffledog Date: September 14th, 2004 02:42 am (UTC) (Link)
It's eerie reading this because my brother just went through almost the exact same thing. I don't want to get into details, because it's his life to report on and not mine, but like you he was out for a while and even had to switch majors and schools. But he got through it with a whole new determination, and I'm sure you will too.
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